It's Just Abbey

Welcome to the second installment of BFFridays! I won’t dilly dally and just get straight to the awesome.

Today’s friend is… ::drumroll:: The lovely and very attractive Phedre.

I met Miss Phedre in college. We both played tenor sax and we were both afraid of the other one. She thought I hated her, I thought she hated me. Why? Who the hell knows? I was super cool with Brown and our commuting bond and she had her fancy new dragon tattoo and legs that never ended. We were always on speaking terms and generally tolerated the other. Solid foundation for a never ending friendship.

My freshman year I was in this class called Springboard. It was a class where a freshman was pair with an upperclassman to be guided through the rough life of being in college. I was paired up with Spirit McGee who convinced me to be the MC for a Lip Syncing contest. Well, I can’t host one and NOT be in it. I needed back up though but my only friend other than Brown at the time was my middle school friend that followed me to college. She wasn’t the adventurous type and only spent time at home. So I needed someone fun. I was sitting in band practice and just went out on a limb to ask Phedre to be my partner. Very unlike me at the time. I am surprised I didn't pee my pants asking her. She was so COOL! But guess what! She agreed!

We didn’t practice anything we just decided on a song. Lady Marmalade. Two of us. Lady Marmalade.

We threw on gold and silver pants and red and blue boas. Not quite like the video but pretty close!

We stormed the stage and did the most bad ass, schizophrenic performance of our lives. And we won motherfuckers. Well, Phedre won. I was the host so wasn’t eligible. Plus my totally awesome Milli Vanilli joke fell flat. NO ONE GETS ME!

She won a round trip flight to Florida! Yes! Awesome! We got a plan together, get her sisters on board and we flew into Daytona to tear it up! We didn’t have a damn plan. All we had were hotel points and a dream. When we got there we discovered it was Daytona Bike Week and the rest is history. (And tales for another campfire.)

I have some many Abbey and Phedre stories I don’t even know where to begin! There isn’t enough space on the internet for all of our insane adventures. So let’s run down the deets.

Occupation: Student and Oboe Goddess
Hobbies: Being an oboe goddess, driving to Delaware and back, mobster
Location: Ohio and Delaware or somewhere in between
Favorite TV shows: Gilmore Girls and Scrubs. The End.
Favorite Drink: Sex on the Beach. I have no idea if that really is her fave, but it should be.
Car: Honda hand me down. Being the youngest is a bitch!
Favorite thing ever: A cross between her Hippo named Delta or her cat named Abbey. (True story: When she moved away I bought her a yellow cat and named it Abbey. According to everyone at the Phedre Family Manor, that cat is a demon. You’re welcome!)
Proudest moment in life: Anytime she recognizes my casual Scrubs quotes or anytime she can out drink you. Don’t try. You will lose.
Notable boys in her life: Twat Waffle – Now Ex boy who once bought her groceries for her birthday a few days late. Delta – Current boy who lives in “fucking Delaware” and gifted her a pretty nifty Hippo.

Phedre is my outraged best friend. When things go wrong she is on my side no questions asked. She is the friend that slams credit cards on bar tops and screams for more drinks. She is the friend who will threaten anyone who crosses me. She spent the better part of the summer 2007 walking two miles to bars in high heels with me and walking barefoot back. She is my brunette twin. When no one in the world can understand us, we call each other. We get us.

The part about Phedre I will always love the most is her stubbornness to know what you need before you do. This was made clear in her role in the Hoppie fiasco. While I hold Hoppie’s analysis for next Friday, this story is all Phedre. Long story short she knew I liked him before I knew I liked him and this famous conversation took place:

Phedre: So I think I kinda like Hoppie. I should ask him out.
Me: YOU DO?!
Phedre: Yeah, is that a problem?
Me: What? No! Of course not… I mean, you’re single and he’s single… Yeah. No issue. Why would I care? Go for it!

I remember that conversation making me die a little inside for unknown reasons at the time. Phedre on the other hand, the sneaky little shrew, knew exactly what she was doing. Lying to make me face my issues. And guys, I had issues. But more on THAT later.

What more can I say? She is a slammin’ hottie. OH! Her code name. Phedre is the name of the main character in Jacqueline Carey’s Kushiel Trilogy. This trilogy was brought to my attention by my BFF Phedre because she loves those books. Not only does she love them but she has loved them probably before they existed. If she had the money I am pretty sure she would get this tattoo on her back in honor of Phedre no Delaunay, hero of our realm!

This is a full back tattoo. Spanning the bottom of the neck to the tailbone. I should set up a PayPal account! Hey Phedre, if I can raise the money will you get this tattoo!? Oh the nerdiness...

But that friends is my brief rundown on the lovely and talented Phedre.

Have a wonderful weekend everyone and be sure to be back on Monday. Last night’s Christopher Moore Debacle is a blog and a half of craziness. And if you haven’t already, BE MY FAN! Other than that… Happy Easter!