It's Just Abbey

As a card carrying woman I find myself being attracted to the strangest men. It was an issue I thought for a while was the minority, but I am finding more and more that I was wrong.

It is common for women to have fantasy crushes with fictional characters be it television or literature. Examples: Mr Darcy, Heathcliff, Romeo, Edward Cullen (I know I know), Noah Calhoun, Jack Dawson, Luke Skywalker, etc.

These figures are the men of honor and romance. They regard women the way we wish real men would. Tenderly, sweetly and with a tad too much protection yet magically still wish for their woman to be herself and free. They are also men of pure good and light. They fight the good fight and always get the girl in the end.

But as of late I have noticed a slight change of pace among women today. While we swoon and beg for these do-gooder men in our life to come sweep us off our feet, we find ourselves impossibly attracted to the villains.

Yes. The bad guys.

I will note before I begin that when I say villain I do not mean truly bad people. Not terrorists, school shooters or serial rapists. I mean people trying to attain a goal and going completely the wrong way about doing it. Thus labeling them the villain. Think Mr Freeze. A man trying to save his ailing wife but doing so in a criminal nature. Had one detail changed in the master plans, any villain could be proved a hero.

But I digress...

Why are women attracted to the villain? Maybe it is just Hollywood today casting the villains with "yummy" boys and flavors of the month but I want to believe it is more than that. In Revenge of the Sith when Anakin slaughtered the last few on his rampage after the Jedi Temple and looked menacingly over his shoulder with cold yellow eyes, my knees buckled. Every brain Sylar removes makes my heart flutter. It has to be more than a pretty face.

But what makes this evil turn sexy? What makes a rational woman yearn for a man bent on destruction?

I will site my first evil and first crush of the vampire persuasion: Deacon Frost. (Blade 1998 played by Stephen Dorff.) A man with a goal, ambition and a true passion. Yes, that passion was bent on evil and self interest, but that's not the point. The point is that this man was active in his goals and dreams. Sure they disagreed with the status quo but that's the beauty in it, isn't it?

But it isn't just our need for a man with a plan. The core of this "issue" is the small part of every girl that craves a bad boy. The leather jacket, the tattoos and the guy on parole. Those of us who haven't dealt with one find the whole idea romantic and dramatic. To those women who have tried their hands at bad boys know that wrangling one down is like hog tying a calf with dental floss. We are all seemingly built with a defect that makes us think we can change men. That the passion and rebellious nature can be honed and refocused. We see that glint in his eye and want selfishly to be the source of it. Like any woman who has dated Charlie Sheen can tell you, this task is (to use another hilarious and visually stimulating analogy) like nailing jelly to a wall.

In the cold face of reality we all seek men with goals. These goals used to be a family, house and a great job. But with the evolution of society and the changing of social norms it is harder for anyone, let alone women, to find a partner with the same ideals and goals as we do. So in fantasy we may all secretly or, in my case, very vocally, crave a man with dreams, no matter how horrible and demented they may seem.

Because let's be honest ladies. Not all of us are Padme. Some of us would love to rule the galaxy.