It's Just Abbey

So this morning I woke up bright and early to watch the Boston Marathon coverage. Let me tell you guys, sitting around snacking while other people run is very invigorating. I got exhausted just watching. But it did spark a small conversation via Facebook with Tank. He informed me that my town will be hosting a Boston Qualifying marathon in October and I should totes run.

Okay. Let me take a moment to remember my first marathon that happened a year ago next Sunday. It was 80 degrees and I was dying. I was running through mile 19 and heard an ice cream truck in the distance. I immediately thought I was having a stroke. They say you can’t remember pain but I can tell you that I remember the dull stabbing in my hips like it was yesterday. I remember the only difference between me running and walking was about 4 seconds of speed. I had glimpses of my life and a warm white light… No wait, now that I think about it that was just the sun glaring down on me in judgment. Screw you sun.

Let me tell you internet. It was the proudest day of my life. If you have ever run a marathon you know exactly why. But for you non running/non marathoners that are reading this let me break it down for you.

26.2 miles. Twenty six point two MILES.

Walking that far is impressive. Finishing is a personal victory in personal endurance. Still don’t get it? I had visions of my thighs snapping and two and bleeding out all over the pavement. At mile 22, that visual was more appealing than running another 4 miles. Finishing takes strength.

So, I am running that marathon in October. Yeah. I am a sucker for punishment. But this time I am going for time. Tank mentioned qualifying for Boston. After I finished laughing my ass off I thought that about it. Now, there is no way that I can finish in 3 hours and 40 minutes. Maybe 4:30. Probably 5:00 but maybe 4:30.

So the training is on! I am going to train and hobble through another marathon (if I can get the day off work that is… grumble…)

So what does that mean? It means more of me complaining about a hobby I love and do voluntarily. You are all welcome. I am going to become a long distance runner if it kills me. And it probably will. If I qualify for Boston I won’t be able to run it. Why? Because I will explode in happiness all over the finish line. That would be unpleasant. If I qualify for Boston I will eat my hat! Note to self: Get a hat just in case.

I need to work out even more and work on my mileage. I took the day off running just to give my legs one more day of freedom before training of doom sets in. But I did sit down and do Ab Ripper X.

Dear My Abs—
I AM SO SORRY!

I feel fine now, honestly but I will tell you now that in the morning I will be in serious amounts of pain. Think about it. Is there anything worse than sore abs? Legs and arms are easy enough to handle. Limping around or the inability to scratch your own face painlessly is one thing but have you ever had sore abs and the flu? I have. You never realize how much you use your abs in a cough until that moment. I had a fever, a headache, couldn’t eat and every time I coughed I burst into tears. If ever there is a time I advocate using “FML” it would be then.

Anyway, I got through most of the work out without too much trouble. I did scream at the instructor and flip off the screen a number of times but I survived. I am going to dig into the rest of the P90X stuff later and incorporate it into my training just as soon as I have a few days to sit around immobile. I like to plan ahead. Just saves the heartache and the limping.

Why P90X? It seems to have a bit more bang for my buck so to speak. My brief affair with yoga yielded no results and is just too freaking calm and bendy for my taste. I need something OMG IN MY FACE and something I can feel. And if I could I would get into Krav Maga but my rinky dink down doesn't offer that kind of fun. Boo. Probably for the best though. Making my body a weapon would get me into too much trouble. Learning to run faster from trouble and farther from trouble would be ideal.

So I will start my long journey of marathon training yet again. I will become a gym rat again which is good since membership there isn’t exactly free… I will need to make sure I keep my mind active throughout this time around. Last time I just ran, ran, ran. When it was over I just had this crazy identity crisis and couldn’t focus on anything. I did have a strange idea to start a web comic the other day. Maybe I should look into that. Look at me, I am just full of crazy, awesome ideas!

Pain is weakness leaving the body! What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger! Other clichés! Huzzah!