So yesterday was a nice rainy day inside. I spent the day chill-axing in front of the computer as I tend to do (no matter what the weather is) and I stumbled upon this picture. Let's take a poll. Who is currently sitting at their computer like th… more »

So yesterday someone suggested that I become a fan of “Not Being Raped by Ben Roethlisberger.” At first I thought, well I am not a fan of Big Ben or being raped… So being raped by him would be a double whammy of suckage. I am a fan of not being raped by him! Then I just started to get mad. Why? Because Big Ben Worthlessberger is on my Top 5 People I HATE HATE HATE List. My list of mortal enemies. These are people I just cannot and will not forgive. They could give me billions of dollars and not rape me and I would still feel like poking them in the eye. Let me run that list by everyone. more »

We all have a Facebook account, yes? Yes. Don’t have one, get one. What are you a social reject? And don’t tell me you have a MySpace. MySpace is dead and the sooner everyone realizes that the better. Anyway, Facebook is something almost everyone has. It is away to keep connected with everyone from your roommate, your significant other, your college drinking buddy to even that one girl you kinda remember from middle school. But it is also the home of some very annoying habits. Many of which bother me daily. more »

Rule #5: If you don't celebrate the holidays, leave everyone else alone. Yes. Jesus was born in the summer. Christmas leeched onto a pagan holiday. We know. Shut up, put money in the bucket and move on.Most important rule! Rule #6: Donate. No avoiding eye contact with bell ringers or pretending to be on the phone. It's time to be a decent human being for once in your life. No one cares how much you donate, just give a little. Times are crap right now and someone, somewhere will have a crappy Christmas. You could help change that. Give a toy or clothes, volunteer, give a dollar to whatever charity the girl at the movie box office is babbling about. Do something for someone else selflessly. THAT is what this season is about.And not so much a rule, but a side note. If you are going to give a dog/puppy to someone this year, rescue one from a local shelter. Say what you will but I will bet money that a pet shop dog is more likely to go insane than a rescued dog. More on this topic later.Happy holidays everyone! I hope you all survive the stress and chaos. Oh! I almost forgot! more »

I love when Apple comes out with a new product. Correction. I love it when Apple thinks about coming out with a new product. They don't even have to say they are doing anything and everyone starts freaking out. Its like the Cold War and we are trying to figure out if they have a bomb. Or a simpler analogy, its like Apple is Jennifer Aniston and we all are trying to decide if that pooch is a baby bump or too many trips to Taco Bell. more »

Everyone is so concerned about office politics and drama that no one ever stops to think about basic etiquette. Opening doors for coworkers even if you don't know them, not reading over someones shoulder, etc. But there is one place that seems to need a set of rules lid out plain and simple.How to use the microwave. It should be such a simple concept but it has become more and more apparent that when people approach the office microwave their brain shuts down and they are rendered stupid and senseless. Now, that could be the radioactive aura of the microwave but more than likely people are just unaware of how to act while cooking their food. So I laid out a few guidelines for you to follow. more »

am one of those snobby grammar/spelling bitches. If you are tweeting with complete disregard to spelling I will just be annoyed. Words like ‘ur’ and substituting ‘are’ for ‘r’ makes me want to shake you until your eyeballs fall out. “But Abbey,” you say, “there are only 140 characters and I cant fit my thoughts into that restriction!” Well jackass, if you can’t fit your thoughts into that, start a blog. more »