I am so glad I don’t have a child. I would be a terrible mom. I’m not rich enough to provide the therapy to my kid that he/she will probably need. Let’s talk about Patrick. As you saw from my last Patrick post, he was bearing beautiful strawberri… more »

I know you all are wondering, “Abbey, what is going on with Patrick the Strawberry Plant!?” I have been getting THOUSANDS of emails a day asking about him. Not really, just go with me.Patrick is flourishing! He has never looked better. My mom was… more »

Last night was the final night of cake decorating! Let me rewind to Tuesday morning at around 3am when I woke up and realized I hadn’t made any butter cream frosting. DAMN! So I reset my alarm for about 30 minutes earlier and went to bed. Now, I wake… more »

Everyone hates giving to charity right? Right. Wait, what? No. Giving to charity rocks! Why? Because it makes you feel all warm and fuzzy inside because you did something for your fellow man. When they cure cancer, I’ll know I helped. Warm and fuzzy… more »

Update on my post yesterday. My abs hurt so bad it hurts to laugh. Moving on. So tonight was class three of cake decorating class. It was yet another jump into making flowers. Tons of flowers. We learned to make daisies, pansies, daffodils, primroses… more »

Pardon this blog if it is a little incoherent because I just got finished with an hour and a half chat with Brown that started with “OMG tea party people are NUTS!” and it finished at “Who the fuck thinks that the new trilogy of Star Wars is preferable o… more »

But mostly this blog is about getting involved in One Book, One Twitter. If even 5% of the #OMGjustinbieber yahoos would read one of the books on the list, the world would be a better place. Oh! I know. Let me add some key words and phrases to this blog to reel in some of the hormone fueled tweens/teens through the genius of Google Search. “Justin Bieber is my boyfriend.”“Robert Pattinson is a sexy biatch.” “Megan Fox naked.”“Two chicks making out. But the chicks are hot, not uggos.” more »

Huzzah and hurrah! I am back and in action after a much needed mental health day. What do I have for you, my loyal readers? Why, I have the continuation of my cake decorating adventures! Without further ado, I give you Cake Decorating 201 – The “Tha… more »

Something rather amusing has been happening to me lately. Whenever I am around my parents or family I start to remember random childhood memories. Okay, that’s not the fun part. The fun part is that when I remember them out loud parents don’t remember them the same way I do. My memory tends to have me very victimized and oh so tiny or just very naive. Much like a famous scene in A Christmas Story.When we first realized that I have a REALLY slanted view of reality I started to think back and recount my childhood from my very first memory. As I did I unearthed one of those memories I really wish I could bury. One of those stories that end with people just shaking their heads at me. Maybe they react that way because I am weird little creature or because we shouldn’t be talking about these stories. We repress them, lock them away and throw away the key. more »

Anywho, today Hoppie and I decided we are going to start a garden this summer. My dad has a kick ass garden and his grandmother used to have a pretty killer one herself so it is something we both clearly think will be awesome and not at all heartbreaking. Nope… Not at all. Yeah… We’ll call this adventure Operation Planting Hopes and Harvesting Sorrow. This garden will either be a wild success or a crushing disappointment of deadness and doom. more »