And. She. Is. BACK! Okay, guys I have been gone for about a month. Where have I been? I have been marathon training and writing. Aaaaand that's about it. The marathon training isn’t too eventful. I run. The end. Writing wise I’ve been working… more »

I am having a tough time blogging this month guys. I have started and restarted this blog a thousand times today. Why? Because my brain is goo. I’ve had a lot going on and also a lot on my mind. As the world takes its final steps into spring everyone is… more »

I love my hair. I just want you all to know that. Not all the time. Some mornings I put aside the comb and ties. I just go straight to the chair and whip. I won’t lie; I never wake up and just say, “Ta da!” and it is gorgeous. This ain’t roll outta bed p… more »

I am taking this blog to say goodbye to two very good friends of mine. My running shoes. They went for their last run on Friday and have now been retired. This was not an easy thing for me. Those shoes and I have been through a lot together. Whil… more »

I know what you are thinking. “But Abbey, it is Saturday!” Well, shove it up your pie hole because I do not conform to your reality! FACE. Okay, either that or yesterday was crazy busy between work and trying to get Hoppie all amped or his birthday. Uphi… more »

Something rather amusing has been happening to me lately. Whenever I am around my parents or family I start to remember random childhood memories. Okay, that’s not the fun part. The fun part is that when I remember them out loud parents don’t remember them the same way I do. My memory tends to have me very victimized and oh so tiny or just very naive. Much like a famous scene in A Christmas Story.When we first realized that I have a REALLY slanted view of reality I started to think back and recount my childhood from my very first memory. As I did I unearthed one of those memories I really wish I could bury. One of those stories that end with people just shaking their heads at me. Maybe they react that way because I am weird little creature or because we shouldn’t be talking about these stories. We repress them, lock them away and throw away the key. more »

Welcome to the second installment of BFFridays! I won’t dilly dally and just get straight to the awesome. Today’s friend is… ::drumroll:: The lovely and very attractive Phedre. I met Miss Phedre in college. We both played tenor sax and we were bo… more »

I am flawed guys. I will wait for you to finish gasping, fainting and losing faith in all that is real. It’s true, guys. I have a flaw. Let me explain a few things first before I spill my shame all over the internet. I once saw a commercial… more »

I was going for a Monday – Friday blog week but a dead internet and passing on the couch like a drunk teenager kept that from happening. Whoops. Also I have decided to start laying out a little Abbey backstory. I’m declaring Friday to be BFFridays! The day I will gush and explain all my strange friends (helping seal the deal of my book deal ::ahem::) more »

So yesterday someone suggested that I become a fan of “Not Being Raped by Ben Roethlisberger.” At first I thought, well I am not a fan of Big Ben or being raped… So being raped by him would be a double whammy of suckage. I am a fan of not being raped by him! Then I just started to get mad. Why? Because Big Ben Worthlessberger is on my Top 5 People I HATE HATE HATE List. My list of mortal enemies. These are people I just cannot and will not forgive. They could give me billions of dollars and not rape me and I would still feel like poking them in the eye. Let me run that list by everyone. more »